Peace From the Pieces

In our sorrow we look at our lives and see brokeness. Broken promises,broken hearts and broken dreams. We try to pick up the pieces on our own only to find it hurts too much. As we mourn what could have been and what should have been we are convinced nothing good can come from these fragments. The old familiar voice of condemnation screams with hateful vengence, “You are ugly and worthless! You will NEVER be good enough!”.

But above the angry shouts there is a whisper, “Beloved, give me the pieces and let me show you just how beautiful you are.” Could it be true? Will you allow yourself to hope,to trust? There is such tenderness in that quiet voice and at the same time such great authority. You hear it again and it is like sweet music to your longing soul. Now the gentle voice says, ”I created you in my image and gave my only Son to die for you.”

Suddenly you realize the desperate voice of the accuser is growing smaller and smaller while the voice of the Master becomes clearer and clearer. Falling to your knees,you cry out,”I do believe!” Your hands tremble as you lift the shattered pieces to Him. Finally there is peace as you feel the burden lifted. Then the Father says,”Look,my child.” And before your very eyes are the pieces you once despised-God has used them to make a mosaic and you are His Masterpiece!

Praise the God of Opportunity

Tonight i had the honor of meeting two brave ladies who will be doing the step study with me starting next week. I would have missed this wonderful opportunity had i let the enemy convince me that it was not worth the trouble to get out in the rain and cold with four children to go into town for a couple of hours. Oh, he tried every trick in the book-i have come to expect this of him. He reminded me my failures today and told me how unworthy i was to be around people who desire change and did not need me to waste their time. After listening to the accusations and lies(why do i listen?) it finally ocurred to me that he was trying awful hard to prevent me from going so it must be very important that i do go. It was with prayer and supplication that i headed out the door and it is with thanksgiving and praise that i share this experience now.
What a shame it would have been to have missed out. What a blessing to have gone and met these wonderful women! Now i have two more names to mention in my prayers tonight and faces to match. Thank You, Father, for every time i have needed encouragement and affirmation You have provided.
Yes Lord, You ARE in control!

The Tongue as a Fire

"And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and is set on fire by hell." James 3:6 As promised, i wrote James 3 tonight. After a day of dealing with loud,boisterous children i was dreading looking into what James had to say to the likes of me but i knew i had to do it. God is teaching me and if i run from His instruction i will never learn. So when the kids went to bed early i knew what i was going to do. I have to admit i had been looking forward to their bedtime today because it has been one of those days when frustration has gotten the best of me and my mouth. I don't know how many times i have had to go back and put out fires that i have started with careless,angry words. Of course, the damage had already been done but maybe it was lessened a bit as i confessed my foolishness by not guarding my lips. Children can be so forgiving just as the Father is forgiving but i sure am tired of my tongue being used as an instrument of unrighteousness. Yet the choice is mine to make. How will i choose tomorrow and the next day and in all the days to come? Help me, Lord to remember the sin shall not have dominion over me as long as i am living under Your grace. "And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace." Romans 6:13&14

Let's Talk

When he takes the throne of his kingdom, he is to write for himself on a scroll a copy of this law, taken from that of the priests, who are Levites. It is to be with him, and he is to read it all the days of his life so that he may learn to revere the LORD his God and follow carefully all the words of this law and these decrees and not consider himself better than his brothers and turn from the law to the right or to the left. Then he and his descendants will reign a long time over his kingdom in Israel. Deuteronomy 17:18-20 Dr. Ray Pritchard cited this passage from Deuteronomy in a recent blog post titled, "Writing the Bible can be Good for Your Soul". The whole article is interesting and thought provoking but don't take my word for it read it for yourself at:http://www.crosswalk.com/blogs/pritchard/11581909/. After reading this article i felt convicted to take up the practice of writing through the Bible myself. Unsure of where to start, i started at the beginning...the book of Genesis. However, after three days of writing and still not getting past chapter 1 i began to wonder if i had made the right choice. Then i started a new Bible study and right off the bat we are talking about how we use our tongues. Talk about conviction! Immediately we are taken to James 3:8-10: "But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not be so." Then the sermon on Sunday night was on the ninth Commandment: "You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor." The third chapter of James was once again referenced at this time. With all this talk about talk i am thinking God is really wanting me to think long and hard about the way i talk. And it is with this in mind that i am starting over tomorrow in my Bible writing. And where will i begin this time? Why, James 3, of course. And from there, wherever He leads me. You see, in my perfectionist thinking i believed i had to write it all in perfect order but my perfect Father seems to have another plan. This should be interesting. I will keep you all posted but before i go i feel led to end with this: "For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." Matthew 12:34 Good night all!

No Makeup, no Costumes and no Candy

The choice not to celebrate Halloween in our family is a matter of personal conviction. I do not wish to judge anyone who does observe this holiday, it is not my place to do so. Most of my friends celebrate and i do not express my opinion on this matter unless asked to do so. It was not until i had children of my own that i was convicted not do Halloween, yet i do remember many Halloween nights as a child and wonder if i am cheating my children now. But the more i learn about the origins and history of this day the more i am convinced i am doing the right thing. Jeremy and i have always been open and honest with the children and they have accepted our decision. When my children ask why some celebrate while others do not i tell them that not everyone is convicted in the same way. This always opens up interesting conversation on spiritual matters and why we believe what we believe. They amaze me with their wisdom and insight. Tonight as we ate pizza at their favorite restaraunt the discussion was brought up again and as we shared there was laughter and enjoyment all around the table. No makeup, no costumes and no candy but happy memories were made just the same. Thank You, Father, for reassuring me once again.

Learning to Dance

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It has been almost a week since i last shared and in some ways the time has flown by, while in other ways it seems to be at a standstill. Many lessons are still being learned by this student who continues to watch the dancefloor but is starting to tap her toes. The music sounds so sweet and the One inviting me to dance is so patient and loving. Mixed in with the music i hear the prayers and encouraging words of friends, now i am swaying to the rythm. From behind me, somewhere in the shadows, comes another familiar voice. It is the one that says, "You can't dance! Your legs are too weak and your feet are like clay. Come back to this wall where no one will see you, it is where you need to stay!". For a moment i stand frozen, paralyzed by the harshness of the voice and the coldness of those words. I am embarassed and feel so foolish. Then i notice others standing around me. I expect to hear jeers and see condenscention in their eyes. My eyes are on the floor. Then i hear a cheer. One voice at first and then it is joined by more voices...and they are cheering for me! "Don't listen to the lies," they say, "but look to the One who is inviting you to the dance!". It is His voice i hear as i turn as i turn to look into His eyes. There are tears in His eyes just as there are in mine. His voice is loving but firm, "Get up and dance, child, this is the song i created for you. Just take my hand and follow my lead. I love you and I want to see you dance!". At first i feel awkward and clumsy but i am strengthened by His embrace. The Lord of the dance has me in His arms and this is where i want to stay.

Let me tell you About my Children

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward." Psalm 127:3 Sooner or later it was bound to happen. As i have already stated and many of you already know, i am a Mama. And now the Mama in me is coming out! You have heard enough about me. Now let me tell you about my children! Yes, there are four of them and three of them are boys. Rachel is the oldest and the only girl but don't pity her, she can handle herself nicely. She is a tomboy, you see, and so proud of it! Brogan (far right) is the oldest boy who loves "Indiana Jones" and wants to be an archealogist one day. Reece (far left) is our middle man and resident commedian with a very contagious laugh. Sawyer(middle) is the "baby boy". You can see in the picture he is no baby and he isn't even the smallest but he is the youngest so that distinction is still his. He is also the one who is most likely to turn out like "Tom Sawyer". Little did we know that when we named him he would be so much like the character himself. Each child is so special and a gift from God. As they grow each day i learn a little more about their strengths and talents. They share their dreams and fears with me and i want to hear it all, to encourage them the best i can. My biggest hope for each of them is that they will be comitted Christians, bold in their faith. Jeremy and i want them to be better and stronger than we have been in our faith so we are as honest as we can be about our failures and weaknesses. We try to show them God's love so they know that nothing will change our love for them but more importantly that God's love for them is unchanging and eternal. I think they are learning quite well. For the gift of children i am grateful. Thank You, Father!