Take my hand, Lord, and lead me through this day, step by step. Remind me that I cannot do everything I wish nor do any of it perfectly. Only you are perfect, and only with your help can I do my best. Help me to remember to ask for that help. -Avery Brooke

Should I or Shouldn't I?

I have been considering for some time doing a food journal. From what i have heard from others it has been helpful for them.
It wouldn't be the first time i have tried this. My first attempts at doing a food journal were not successful at all.
My problem is i already know i eat way more than i should and i don't see where keeping a journal will actually help. Journaling my thoughts and prayers has always helped but when it comes to journaling my eating habits i tend to become more frustrated and give up after a few entries. My other problem is i tend to be a bit of a perfectionist and can be so anal about how i do things.
Still i do feel i need to give this another try. Making excuses has gotten me nowhere.
If anyone reading this has ever kept a food journal i would love to hear from you. Guess i could just use a little encouragement right now.

To the Dreamer

What is the thing you desire that consumes your every waking thought and makes sleep difficult? What is it that fills your heart with passion? What stirs your emotions so deeply that you think you might explode? Is it a dream you have only just begun to allow yourself to dream? Maybe you’ve always had the potential but did not recognize it. Maybe you were told not to dream so you hid it away but that dream was just beneath the surface calling out to be set free. You supressed it for so long for so long that in time you forgot that dream and wondered what was that nagging in your soul. On the outside you would smile and hope no one would notice the tears. Then you got tired of the mask and wondered what life would be without it. The desire for change became greater than the fear of the unknown so you stepped into the light and began to remove the mask. At times you remembered your scars and wanted to cover up again. But it was your dream that made you put the mask back down. Without the mask you could see more clearly the truth you could not see before. The light was Christ and God was the One who gave you your dream. Free to dream you set out to be the dreamer God created you to be. So why now you worry and fret? What God has given as a gift you have allowed to become a burden. Your best intentions have become your worst nightmare because God did not expect you to be perfect, you put that unrealistic expectation on yourself. Just let God direct your steps, beautiful dreamer, and He will make the dreams He gave you come true

Improvements Needed

"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us." Hebrews 12:1 What areas do you need to improve upon? I have to admit when i got to this part of the challenge i lost some of my enthusiasm. In my stinking perfectionist thinking i hear the word improvement and my first thought is, "You're no good.". Now perfectionism can affect a person in one of two ways: it will either push you into over-achieving or cause you to shrink in fear that you will never be good enough. I fall into the latter category. So number one on my list of improvements to be made is my way of thinking. Instead of looking inward i need to be looking upward. Number two on my list involves the use of time. I can be very selfish with my time. After homeschooling in the morning, cooking and cleaning in the afternoons and washing throughout the day all i want to do with whatever time is left is check my email, look at Facebook or blog. Most days that is how i "connect" with others. When i feel lonely, anxious or depressed i turn to food to numb these emotions. One way or the other i feel like i am going to explode. At least an escape to the computer keeps me out of the kitchen...for awhile. Guess you have figured out number three! Number four would probably be learning to be still. That's another hard one for me. I have been accused more than once of having ADD and OCD. What does that tell you? Organization also comes to mind. I have never been accused of being organized. People with organizational skills astound me. How i wish some of that skill would rub off on me! And number six? Getting to bed earlier! All these improvements require discipline-number seven. This is where perfectionism can kick in and i can throw my hands in the air and say, "I'll never get it!". But i don't want to do that anymore. Instead i will refer to a church sign i spotted yesterday as i drove home from an errand, "When you are through improving, you are through". Could this be what the writer of Hebrews was talking about? If we are to finish this race on top aren't we continually making the necessary improvements to get there? Life is about improving but we can not make those improvements on our own. God shows us where we need to improve and then He says, "Let Me help you." Thank you, Father, for showing me, Your child, the areas of needed improvement in my life. Help me to run this race with endurance.